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Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Blame

Today's word...
Blame

Just recently a few Russian spies were caught.
Are we really safe in our own country?
Who do you blame?
A new woman is being confirmed as a Supreme Court Justice.
She doesn't have all the experience that some would like her to have.
One politician said she was only chosen for political reasons. (wow, that's something new)
Who do you blame?
A man found with explosives in Time Square.
Who do you blame?
There is an oil spill in my parish (county) causing people to lose jobs, money, and homes.
Man, too bad they only have their lives to live.
Who do you blame?
There is a battle over the boarders that are allowing large numbers of Mexican's cross over. Last time I checked, there is more than one way to do anything.
Who do you blame?
There is a war going on that is said to be the longest war we have ever had that is killing hundreds of Americans monthly.
Oh and this is what is supposed to be keeping us safe from those intruding in our country as spies and/or to harm us.
Who do you blame?

Is there always someone to blame? Presently, there is one man to blame for all of this. It's so amazing to me. How can one human be to blame for all these events? I'm no rocket scientist and no political expert - just a human being. But I see no way that it is possible for one man. A person who didn't come from a family with connections. Basically, a "peon" in the eyes of those in the political world. And you know what? If he were to blame, what's new in the world of politics.

Everyday someone is looking for someone to blame on what is happening in their lives. Truth be told, sometimes there is no one to blame. It makes the hair stand up on my arm as people place the blame on others. Especially when the people talking have no clue what the heck they are talking about. What's more entertaining to me is that the blame is almost always placed on the wrong person.

People blame their friend or relative for their shortcomings. Sometimes it's that person to blame and sometimes it's just the circumstances in life that are to blame. Why do we always need someone to blame? Even if there is a person to blame, they won't always be able to fix the outcome of what they may have caused. In my most gracious opinion, the wrong person always gets blamed for doing something bad.

As always, I try to take something from everything. My lesson learned: when someone starts to blame someone whom I know isn't to be blamed...just walk away. Why walk away? Because most of the time the person placing that blame is some idiotic human being that will cause me to do nothing but become mad! So, when I walk away from you...blame yourself.

Monday, June 28, 2010

Space

Word two for today...

Space

In this space I'm in, it doesn't look so pretty. It's a little too noisey yet freightenly too quiet.

If this chick up stairs don't sit her tail down I'm going to scream! AHHHH!!! It's too funny that I'm talking about two things at once. Ha!

I truly want to live in a space where I hear only the sounds in my space. I don't care where you are walking in your space. It's late. I'm not up walking around in my space, so why don't you just sit your ass down! Ugh...

What is that I hear? Your 'ole man is pissing in the toilet! Are you serious? Man, I don't care what goes on in your space, so why must I hear it all in my space.

In my deepest thoughts, I try not to question what God puts in my life or where my decisions in my life take me. However, living in this space has tested my patience and sanity in ways one can never imagine.

My space is precious to me. I find peace and serenity in my space. It's the only place that knows me. It's the only space that leaves me alone with my happy thoughts. I normally love my space - filled with the scent of Egyptian Musk Incense or sweet Vanilla candles. Uhm, ahhh I can smell them now. Ugh, gag wait, I just got sniff of some second-hand smoke from somebody else's space. Lord, my God, you have truly shown me the light! This is not the space. This is not the space for me.

My lesson: Is your space really the space you are sitting in? What is space actually? Is it what you make it? Can I make a bad space in life, physical or mental, a good space? I don't think I truly know the answer. Until then, I must learn to accept the space I'm in while I'm in it. Live with it. Deal with it. Change it.

Don't sell yourself short!

Life is about balance. I'm trying to make sure to balance my lifestyle and keep it healthy on all points. Recently, one of my instructors had a career coach from the university that I'm attending speak to the class. He was extremely helpful and inspirational. I encourage everyone to go out and meet with a real career coach. Everyone needs a little motivation every now and then. He served that purpose for me.

While there are no guarantees with what people tell you etc., they do help.
The career coach requested that we read Strenths Finder, by Tom Roth
http://www.strengthsfinder.com/113647/Homepage.aspx.
I read the book, took the quiz and remain amazed. There are so many strengths within ourselves that we don't see. His reasoning for telling us to read this book was just for that reason. How can we market ourselves to others if we don't know what our selling point is? After reading this, I feel more confident about how to sell myself to a employer or even a date. LOL! Now that was funny. I had to laugh to myself.

I challenge all who read this to seek out those strengths about yourself. I think we all second guess ourselves. Sometimes we sell ourselves short and don't realize all that we do in a day. We think that sitting behind a desk and talking to the public is just that. When in actuality, it is much more. We are negotiating on that phone and constantly making great decisions.

God mad nothing but greatness. You are great! I am great!

Lesson: There is greatness in all of us! Seek and ye shall find!

AUDACITY

I had my closest friends throw out some words to me. From those words, I've written my thoughts. Today's word is Audacity. Here it goes...
The Audacity of ME to...
pity myself
not want life
hate my body
regret
cry
love
love him
care
get pregnant
abort
give birth
be a mother
be a single mother
get married
get a divorce
pray
work
get an education
write
read
love me
eat
live
The audacity of me! Damn!
My lesson with this word is to realize that I can't think of all my what ifs all the time. It's so much more serious than that, if you have the audacity to read between the lines.
A good cup of coffee gets my day started. Who invented drinking a good cup of joe? Uhm, ahhh! Ice cold water and a hot cup of coffee, nothing can compare.

This is only the second day I've worked on this blog and it's already presenting a challenge. The site is telling me that I need to disable some cookies. I've followed the instructions to do so, but my computer won't do such a thing. Who in the heck came up with these cookies? The last I checked cookies came in chocolate chip, peanut butter, and sugar. They made me happy, not pissed off.

I've tried to turn every life experience into a lesson. Lesson here is to not let one little irritating event stop the progress of what you are trying to do.

Sunday, June 27, 2010

It's past 12am. This is the only peaceful time I get. I enjoy it while it lasts. It's a blessing to have a child, but some things in life are a blessing and a curse. Motherhood, all alone is no picnic. No, I never thought it would be. However, I never imagined this life in any way. Who could imagine finding a crappy husband. You go into it with great plans and love. Then it all falls apart quicker than a flash of an eye. It's cool, it's fine and dandy. My faith in a higher power knows that all things happen for a reason. My noisey and constant busy days are just preparation for something greater. I don't want to sound like I'm bashing being a mother. That is not the case. Just like with anything in life, your job, your husband, etc., you get frustrated with things sometimes.



I'm just frustrated for so many reasons. Lately, my concern has been that I can't give my child something he desires and truly needs. A father. At this point, he truly does only have a sperm donor. He needs a role model. Someone to show him the simple things in life. It's totally different coming from a woman. I can't show him how to play sports like a boy does. There are just some things that I truly can't show him. Now, I try my best. There is just nothing like the real thing baby.



Whew, so much so fast. What a way to start off this lovely blog writing. The journey has just begun. Thanks to my friend, Charlene who inspired me to try this...the book will follow in years to come! She felt like his would be a great start to my life-long dream.